Thursday, March 26, 2009

i love the beach

Ever since the warm month of march rolled out of the calendar, I've been obsessing about going to the beach.

Well honestly, I've been obsessing about going to the beach all year long, whether in warm weather or cool - it's just that the realization of summer heightens my urgency to go beach-ing.

The Hubby and I were fortunate enough to spend an overnight's stay at an acquaintance's private seaside sanctuary. I would have preferred for us to be alone, but this was a staff outing so we spent it with a few other church people. Anyway, it's still a blessing.

Beauty heals,
I've been told.

The place was lovely. It had a mostly-white modern-zen thing going on.

The sand was even combed into gentle waves, zen-garden style.

To the infinity pool and beyond.

I love walking barefoot in the sand, right where the sea kisses the shore.

I found me some tiny shells for my own mini-zen-garden.

And I just love pink beach sunsets.

I've been wanting to sleep under the stars again - even if it meant waking up all damp with dew. It's no fun doing it in the city, because there are hardly any stars in the city sky. The sky at this beach wasn't as bright as I had hoped it would be, but it at least didn't have as many absentee stars as the city nights always do.

Orion was present; so were Canis Major, Canis Minor, Ursa Major, Leo, Virgo, Crater, Hydra, Cancer. Gemini's Castor and Pollux.

I was the last person to sleep because I was busy getting reacquainted with my old friends, the stars. I went to bed only because I got spooked that I was possibly the only soul awake at that beach that time.

I lay down and talked to God, and I expected Him to answer - and then I realized that I was right beneath a great big cross formed by the stars of the constellation Leo.

The Hubby woke me up sometime around 3am to tell me we ought to move inside because the sea-breeze was going down to freezing degrees. I opened my eyes to marvelous night-sky jewels -- Scorpius, Ophiuchus, Hercules, Serpens, Corona Borealis, Bootes, Coma Berenices. I even spotted the spectral Milky Way. Gemma, the yellow alpha star of Corona, was right on top of me. I didn't want to budge because it was just all too pretty.

I didn't wake up early enough to catch the sunrise.

But it's still a nice, clear morning by the sea.

Contact with beauty really does make life a bit more worthwhile.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

winding down early

I was fortunate to be able to wind down earlier than usual last night, and thus go to bed relatively earlier. And (though I was obsessing a bit over the things that I could have been doing instead of taking a break), I was glad that by 8pm, I wasn't at the computer as I usually would be.

It was a happy little accident actually. I was set to attend a 7pm meeting so I put my notes and work-stuff aside and turned the laptop off. I later learned that the meeting was canceled. I thought of going back to the laptop to get some work done before going to bed. But since this old machine i work on takes around thirty minutes to switch on, boot and warm up, I decided to just let it rest. I reckoned could use some rest myself. In wanting to avoid the unnecessary techno-stress, I thought of just winding down with the Hubby in front of the telly instead. I haven't been able to do that in a while, and it felt nice to.

To keep my mind from obsessing over the next day's work, I took a pad of paper and a pencil and did some drawing. I came up with something rather cute. That's something else I miss doing - drawing, I mean - and was really glad to have had time for it last night.

I love the computer and I love the internet - in fact I realize I've gotten quite dependent and spend too much time on it - but I really appreciate staying away from the computer sometimes. Because I get to be in touch with the other things that I love.

I'm considering the discipline of logging off by 8 or 9pm, whether or not work is done. I think that's a good idea. Pack up early, dim the lights and wind down with a cold glass of chocolate milk. Why not? Maybe a good book and a soft pillow next time instead of TV and pencil-and-paper.

Friday, March 6, 2009

until then

A friend went to Heaven this week.

We all knew that his time was coming, but a loss is still a loss. We'll be missing him greatly, but we won't ever forget the things that he imparted onto out lives.

Saddened as I am by his passing, I have a reason to smile as I think that he's in a better place now. Streets of gold and pearl gates; no sickness, no curse of sin. He will never have to hurt anymore. He's probably young again, and strong again, feeling the joy and health and wholeness in his bones that he's been longing for all these years. Dancing again - maybe even dancing like he's never done before. Sitting at the feet of his Creator as a form of worship, and hearing the answers to those baffling questions he's always pondered on with Him. Witnessing first-hand, with each and every one of his senses, how his earth-wise theology pales in the light of the actual Reality. He's finally there, at that perfection that he's been preparing almost all his mortal life for.

(Now, I'm jealous)

We who know him will be in a period of mourning for a while, but we'll be remembering forever.

Goodbye, Dr. T.

At least, until then.

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

premier post

I decided to make another blog.

Something warm and glowing and pink and refreshing. Something like a glass of chocolate milk, a smiling crescent-moon, a cool drop of water on a hot day.

A cup of chamomile tea to cap off a busy night.

This'll be my place for gems and silver linings, happy thawts and pleasantries, likes and favorite things, my breath of fresh air in the middle of city life. Because I need a way to preserve my sensibility (and sanity) while in a cluttered, muddled existence. I think of it as a manner of counting blessings while counting sheep.